OBAMA VICTORY LAYS WASTE TO FUNNY BUSINESS

McCain Defeat Dries Up Humor Market

  Massive Freelance Levity Layoffs Loom 

 Humorist Calls Upon Peers For "Solidarity In Satire" 

() Disassociated Press

by B. Elwin Sherman -- The Electioneerist 

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- (DP) Overnight, the historic election of Barack Obama to the presidency has created a huge but useless surplus in the freelance humor columnist market.

"We could be screwed," said nationally syndicated humor writer B. Elwin Sherman, as he sat down this morning for his daily muse and discovered that his normally overflowing well of inspiration had suddenly dried up.

"So far, nothing's worked," he said, his hands trembling over the keyboard.  "I mean, in one night, all the juicy motivations are gone:  phony plumbers, real Alaskans, goofy governors, moose burgers, wardrobes, even the 'fundamentals of our economy'  ... what do we write about now? 

He added that he'd spoken early this morning with some of his fellow humorists:  "Dave Barry's so depressed, he's thinking of starting up his column again," he said.  "The only place you'll find more gloom today is with Republican strategists."

Karl Rove at Fox News was quick to agree.  "When you throw everything at 'em -- redistributing radical, Muslim elitist, Black socialist, evangelical terrorist, wealth-spreading communist, and the guy STILL wins?  Not much funny out there this morning."

"Say ... that might be the angle," said Sherman.  "I mean, what's funnier right now than a Republican stategist?" 

As the humorist began typing, this reporter glaced over at the screen:  "What do a plumber, a pundit and a pig all have in comm----"

Stay tuned.

Comments

[steppatel]

Oh, you aren't kiddin'. Fortunately, I live in Alaska, where the great stuff flows like oil, providing some job security. A pork-king senator convicted of seven felonies who is re-elected? A chastised governor trying to mend a lot of broken fences with a smile and the "who, me?" approach. Diva, who me? Thought Africa was a country, who me? Scorned the bridge to nowhere, who, me? Dissed pork, who, me?

[B. Elwin Sherman]

Steppatel:

Thanks for writing! We do strive for equal time in political humorjinks, but right now we're in the breadline with Tina Fey. You live in Alaska? I live in New Hampshire. If I promise not to hold you responsible for Sarah Palin, you'll have to find me faultless for the Old Man falling off his (Franconia) Notch ....

Thanks again for the post!

Best,
El